ForgottenWoman

… and Into Eternity

A subject that I touch on in my Defining Moments story has been literally pounding through my thought process the past few days. It was 1987 when this “motto” became a part of my life. As with most “defining moments’ of life there have been times of my allowing this motto to change me, my reactions and responses, priorities and goals and there have been times that I’ve ignored the message of the motto. 

Looking at the new year ahead of us, I am determined to allow these words to reach deep within my being and transform me where there is a need. Think about this with me and allow yourself to be challenged as well. 

In 1987, it was the sudden death of my husband and a visit from a wise lady into my home that turned my thinking in this direction. My heart and mind were reeling with grief and devestation and I was struggling to make sense of the every day details of life. I vividly remember the frustration I felt when those around me discussed trivial things – like television shows, recipes, clothing, weather and more. My two baby boys needed so much more from me than these ‘minor’ things in life. My new friend, Jackie, sat and listened to my ramblings patiently and she would tell me later that she walked through my bedroom praying for me all night for the 3 nights that she was in my home. She looked at every item that she saw that spoke to my relationship and love for my husband and she asked the Lord to take care of me and my boys. She asked Him to show me how to live moving forward without him with us.

One morning she said, ”With every decision and every frustration ask yourself this – Is this going to matter in eternity?” The more I thought about her words the more sense it made to me and the more purpose and deliberation it gave to my days. I began to make this question a priority in my mind. I could take you through specific scenarios for hours, but I won’t. I ask that you take the time to do that for yourself. Here are just a couple of examples. 

*My toddler just spilled red juice on my light colored carpet for the 5th time. ”Is this going to matter in eternity?” No. But my response to him will! Will he want to know the Jesus that his mommy talks about? Probably not if she gets bent out of shape over a little thing like a carpet stain. He will probably want to know more about her Jesus if she can control her tongue in frustrating moments like this!

*A family member made thoughtless comments about how a high school girlfriend was hurting as much as I was – because she loved my husband too. ”Is this going to matter in eternity?” No – though the anger that whelled up inside of me was real. How ridiculous that anyone would compare what I had just lost to the feelings of a high school girlfriend. I could have responded very shortly and put the relative in his place for his callous remarks – but the truth is that Scripture says that a soft answer turns away wrath. Standing up for myself and my own feelings in that moment may have been satisfying for a time – but deep down I knew that patiently considering the overwhelming thoughts and feelings of the man who spoke the words was a better response. Obedience to Scripture does matter in eternity – my short lived frustration did not.

*Daily frustrations are quickly put in their place with this question. Rudeness of others, dirty dishes, having to repeat the same chores over and over because of the presence of others in our lives, the happy squeals of children running and playing. My response to each of these things will be different if I will just stop and ask myself, “Is this going to matter in eternity?” If so – it’s worth considering and fixing. If not – how I deal with it might make a difference in the eternity of another! 

Another way that this motto will transform the coming year:  how we spend our time! How often do we choose what is easy, convenient or costs us the least – giving us the greatest gain? How often do we disappoint others because at the last minute we just didn’t feel like doing what we had promised to do – or what benefits others above self? How would that change if we choose to do what truly matters in light of eternity? I’m pretty sure our days would look dramatically different.  

So – I challenge you as we go into 2024 – take some time and think about how this simple “motto” could change you. As you are planning your month, your week and down to the details of your day, prioritize those things that truly matter! ”Is this going to matter in eternity?” If so, then you’re going to make sure it happens. Other things can wait! How will it change your responses, your reactions and your ability to point those you love and even strangers to the love of Christ? 

“Get your mind out of time and into eternity!” Instead of laying on that horn next time, maybe you’ll be able to smile as you ask yourself, ”Is this going to matter in eternity?”