ForgottenWoman

When you feel lonely, different, unwanted, unnoticed…

Every once in a while I sit back and look around. I usually end up in a puddle of tears. My take away from my moments of introspection today:

Life is hard. Life is unpredictable. Life has not gone according to my plans. That’s ok because I serve a big God Who loves me enough to hold onto me during the bumpy ride of life! I’ve also discovered that I don’t fit into the box of “normal”. My family and even friends have a few pet names for my idiosyncrasies: I will NOT tell you what they are. Here’s the thing. I’m ok with it. My Heavenly Father knew me while He formed me. He knew every crazy inch of my heart, mind and body. He knew that I would be widowed with babies at the age of 23. No, there were no friend groups for that. He knew that I would be burdened to home educate my children before home education was a “thing” and it would be a lonely journey for many years! He knew that He would give me a houseful of children to invest 100% of my time in for many years and He knew all of the “differences” that their unique needs would bring into my life. He even knew that I would have all 9 via C-section and spend days alone in recovery (well, alone as far as adult world) He knew details of my current life that I haven’t shared yet. He knew many unique things about my life that none of you know! He knew and built in me a passion for things that others don’t share. He knew that I would love people and my serving them in unique ways gives me great joy… I could go on and on.

I’ve learned to accept the things that make me different and focus on being the BEST different me that I possibly can be! So, when you think, “ Man, I just don’t get her! She just isn’t my cup of tea.” Or “ Why does she…” it’s really ok. I have a Savior Who is also my friend and He designed this crazy.

And… I am so blessed with the world’s most amazing children. (Including additions) I love you all!

Why do I share? Because I know some of you are struggling. You don’t have a best friend because you just haven’t connected with anyone that closely. You don’t get invited to the girls weekend or nail adventure simply because… You find yourself working alone in things you are passionate about because no one else feels the same passion. You often feel “less than” because you’re always on the outside of the inner circle… My message is for you today. IF you are kind, loving, giving and don’t push people away: (in other words; if you aren’t hurting others or making people not want you in their lives) you may just be created to be the unique YOU that you are. Do everything in your power to be a blessing and let God use you because He didn’t mess up when He created you.