ForgottenWoman

Disaster!

The state of the world we live in… and can you and I make a difference?

There was a quote floating around last week that I think was attributed to Charlie Kirk and it was something to the effect of, “When we stop talking, that is when violence begins!” I was also reading this morning that the most damage that is done to marriages is not all of the obvious things like affairs or money disagreements, etc., but emotional neglect – lack of communication.

The problem is that too often, many refuse to talk about things that are difficult to talk about, or things that they are sensitive about, or yes, things that challenge who they are or what they are thinking/doing. Hey, we’re ok with the status quo – surely we don’t need to consider that we are part of the problem, right?

Today, I have a perfect example that really is heartbreaking! There was a young teen girl who came into my life through social media about 20 years ago. She contacted me privately because she was really struggling – suicidal, having problems with her family relationships, and her church and school. There were numerous nights that I talked with her for hours when she was at her lowest – a few times when she was on the brink of ending her life. We maintained a relationship through social media all of these years, and it has been a good one… We talked through relationships, job changes, goals, her gifts, and how God could use her, and more. For all of these years, I felt that the relationship, though long-distance and though I had never met her in person, was a valuable one. I hoped that I had encouraged her to go to God’s Word in every situation, and she taught me much in her open transparency about all that she struggled with. My eyes were opened to not only what so many young people were/are dealing with, but also how little real help they are getting from those close to them.

As I said, it was a good and seemingly productive relationship. Until yesterday. She messaged that anyone who was grieved over the death of Charlie Kirk was no longer welcome in her life! She has been surrounded by the lies of this world, the social media propoganda that has confused her even further concerning her identity, who she is and why God created her. She has bought into the lie that God messed up when he made her a female and He messed up when He created male and female for intimate relationships – and she has declared herself finally free – and finally able to admit who she is.

It started a few months ago when she began chastising anyone who used what she considered the wrong pronouns when speaking to her or about her. What struck me was the passion/anger with which she attacked for this ‘offense.’ I didn’t speak with her about this – I just watched as she dove more deeply into this mindset, ostracizing all who had once been a part of her life. Obviously, she hasn’t reached out to me since ‘coming out’ knowing that I would point her back to God’s Word – and she isn’t open to hearing that right now.

Well, as we have all been experiencing this past week, the assassination of Charlie Kirk has highlighted our differences in beliefs, but it has also widened the gap and deepened the divide in our ability to communicate. See, so many who have bought into the lies simply refuse to listen to anyone who has a different view. They refuse to communicate – to even have a chance to accidentally see or hear our opinions. My friend is one of these.

She has bought into some really horrendous lies about who Charlie was. She refuses to actually watch any videos of him talking to college students, refuses to listen to people who disagreed with him on many issues, but talk about how he actually treated them. She is angry based on what she has read and heard through mainstream media and social media… And you guessed it – I am no longer welcome in her life because I am not celebrating his death!

She sent out a very pointed message to her friends, stating that anyone who was grieving the death of Charlie could go ahead and unfriend and block her immediately. If you know me, then you probably know that I sent her a private message. In that message, I told her that it wasn’t my desire to unfriend or block her and that I felt we had walked through many dark paths together and could remain connected, even though I am grieving Charlie’s death. She did not respond but did immediately unfriend and block me – shutting down any chance for me to communicate with her further.

If you disagree with me or I disagree with you – refusing to have contact any longer simply isolates us and our knowledge and understanding inside a very small bubble… where no growth or even intellectual thought is allowed! If you disagree with me and cut me off and end a relationship that has been invested in because you are unwilling to have real discussions and care or hear from me – you’ve lost someone real in your life. Just sayin’.

Maturity requires communication. Growth requires communication. Understanding requires communication. Any sort of working society requires communication. Love requires communication. We do no one any favors when we shut out those who differ from us. I cannot do much about the overall world condition, but I can certainly, as an individual, make this a priority in my own life.